Folks, I'm not a stranger to controversy- the Liberal media has been trying to nail me for years with phony-baloney allegations. In recent months I have come under intense fire for my alleged involvement in the Michael Vick dog fighting controversy as well as accusations of child abuse revolving around my recent work volunteering as the head coach of Landover's pee-wee football team. Now I am receiving even more pressure over some "racist" remarks I made in a recent broadcast of The Wash O'Hanley Show.
Of course I'm a reasonable man and I see arguments from all perspectives and I have considered the complaints made against me for a statement I made. However, I am Wash O'Hanley and I will not apologize or retract my statement like so many cowardly broadcasters have before me (I'm looking at you Imus). I am nothing if not a steadfast supporter of the first Amendment and I believe that what I said, when taken in context, is hardly as offensive as the Liberal media has deemed it.
On last Friday's program I sat down with Professor of African Studies at Iowa University, Ida Beam. We were discussing slavery and other niggardly topics when I said, and I quote "slavery is the best thing to happen to the Afro-American culture". Of course this statement is wildly inappropriate and offensive when read like this but please listen to it in its entirety and in the proper context.
"I sat in on one of your lectures last week, Ida, and I must say that I was very taken aback... by how civilized and orderly the black students were- there wasn't one example of a student saying something like 'I want a MFing education'. I was very surprised. I thought, going in, that there would be dice games all over the room and women wearing nothing but 'butt floss' shaking their butts all over the place but to my surprise everyone was sitting in their seats, quietly, listening to the teacher. I honestly believe that slavery is the best thing to happen to the Afro-American culture. I mean... it brought the blacks out of the jungle and into America. I did a little research of my own and I discovered that during slavery- in America- 100% of the blacks were employed. Compare that with the employment statistics today and it is a no brainer that slavery was a godsend to the black community. I mean how often do you hear black people complain about not having enough money or a job? Bring back slavery and solve the employment crisis- it's that simple."
I hope this will end the bombardment of hate mail, anger and gunshots that have been directed at me these past three days.I am extending an olive branch... or... a water melon vine... to the black community in hopes that they will understand the good nature of my comments.